Halitosis

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006 at 4:22 PM EDT

A long while ago there was this guy named Mike who had a crackhead brother named James who’d go around telling big lies just to hold a conversation. Their last name was Hayward and their father was suppose to be some kind of plumber.

Well anyway, a pipe needed to be cut and repaired inside of my family’s upstairs bathroom during the winter of the year 1999. It had to do with a radiator we had and we weren’t able to get any heat within our entire house so we were all freezing. Mike was supposedly trying to follow in his father’s footsteps by doing plumbing work. James, who we’d known for a long time brought over his brother Mike, who we’d just met to fix the pipe an help get us some heat.

While Mike was suppose to be doing his work he was too busy profiling and cracking jokes to try to be funny. But instantly i didn’t find him to be attractive or amusing.

When Mike finished one part of the work he’d done for the night my mother paid him sixty dollars then served him and his brother James a plate of food. You know, it beat spending a arm and a leg to hire a “real plumber”.

After the guys ate they watched a movie on cable with us and immediately my mother and i picked up on how Mike was attracted to me. I didn’t like the way he was making himself too comfortable around me. I read him right away as like i do most people.

That night passed.

James came over on one of his visits without Mike, saying how we were going to be seeing a lot of his brother because he was liking me but James knew that i wasn’t interested in his brother because later on James admitted to me and my mother that Mike was angry do to the fact that i didn’t want him.

He even talked about Mike to us saying that Mike was stupid and that he was always laying up with different women. I learned that Mike was born under the sign Pisces so most of them are weak for sex anyway.

In between time when Mike was coming by my house back then he tried to push himself on me and that made me mad because i didn’t desire him at all. Every time he’d go to speak to me i had to turn my head because his breath smelled so very bad. It literally smelled like shit. I’ve smelled plenty of peoples bad breath but i had never smelled no shit like that before.

He had the nerve to ask my mother “where’s my baby at?” talking about me as he was making his way up the steps to the room that i was in. I overheard him.

Mike was moving way too fast! He acted as if he just knew we were going to be together and that pissed me off even more because to me he was no good kind of catch at all.

Mike considered himself to be a cute guy, however, i didn’t see where at. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and to me Mike was ugly. His physique was very unappealing to me. He was sized bigger at the top than he was at the bottom. He wasn’t proportioned right. And he carried his ass on his back. Mike had one of those “back butts”. Mike was also poor with his outer bodily hygiene he was funky around his neck area.

All of those stupid women that he’d messed with must have filled up his head, making him think that he was hot stuff and some type of hunk.

The way that i saw it the women Mike was messing around with had to be ugly women because in my opinion no very attractive woman such as myself would want to be running after and then falling all over him. He was nothing to fall all over at.

Out of curiosity i asked James one night how do the women Mike runs around with look like and he just confirmed what i already knew, “they’re all black and bruised” he told me in return.

I know that James is a big liar but he wasn’t lying about that! I know what i can believe and not believe when words come from a liar.

I had took a ride with Mike out to Home Depot to buy a new lock for my front door. On the way back he stopped off at a gas station and bought a little bottle of Scope mouthwash but that didn’t help his problem. I still smelled his rotten breath.

When we returned home he called himself putting on the lock then fucked it up by breaking it. He opened it up by going inside of it with a screwdriver then screwed it back up to put it on the door then called himself fixing a lock. Every time my mother and i would put our key inside the keyhole the whole lock would turn around in a circle. We had to re- purchase a brand new lock and i had to sufficiently put the lock up on our door.

Mike had the nerve to want three thousand dollars to finish the bathroom pipe. He didn’t get shit! He couldn’t even put a lock on the door. It took him hours just to cut the pipe when he first came to my house.

What i read about Mike is that he was a nothing looking for a woman to take care of him. What he needed to do was to go to a doctor to take care of that nasty breath of his.

Do you know that my mother broke down and called a real plumber who came to our house and did the pipe work in just a snap! I still remember to this day. The guy was a young very attractive Italian who had a appealing physique. He was healthy and everything was set in the right place.

The man was very professional and that made me think about how much i couldn’t stand Mike.

People who really got it “going on” don’t need to try to be more than what they are and what they’re not because they already know and just be themselves.

http://misslatoya.wordpress.com/2007/08/26/halitosis/

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